Live Your Best Life

Living On Lack

For awhile now, our country has been spoon feed a theory--one which has served only to broadcast one single, solitary idea.

Lack.

News about the economy, bailouts, unemployment (and the list goes on) have been so deeply penetrating most everyone I talk to subscribes to the idea of America sliding into the 10th level of hell. And soon.

Lack, lack and more lack.

With that eventually, we will most certainly be drawn into the dark pits along with it ... right?

At least,  it seems to be the story we are told time and time again in newspaper articles and on the daily news. But I'll leave the debate of politics and the media to someone who is far more interested in such tedium than I.

This post is not going to be about conspiracy or about how jaded and corrupt the media may/may not be. Today I want to focus on being response enabled. However, the current situation with an unstable economy presents a good example of how we always focus on the things we lack.

In all things we have a choice, we can focus on the perception of lack or we can be response-able and take action towards the resolution of a problem.

Take the past few years I've spent in network marketing as an example. I'm a strong introvert working successfully in network marketing. As an introvert I didn't have the innate people and communication skills that many possess. After spending a year in network marketing (2006) and not making a penny I could have folded and walked away from it all.

Instead, Tom and I focused on finding something which would accentuate the positives within me, and allow me to find my voice. At the time, I didn't have even an ounce of confidence in me but he noted the passion in the emails I sent him recounting the joys of self discovery.

As a result, I started blogging and within a single month I was getting linkbacks to this very blog from high profile bloggers. Next thing I knew, I had a following and a fantastic group of people who were cheering me on. For the first time in my life, people were telling me I had value and a talent, a talent for writing and inspiring others.

As a lost and confused introvert these were very new and shocking statements. It took me that entire first year to even begin accepting their praises because I was so well versed in the idea of lack.

I don't understand why they are saying these things. I'm just an average joe, sharing some thoughts, experiences, quotes and poems which have inspired me to grow.

I'm not a talented writer.

Why are they describing me as a thought leader? I'm not ready for that (Little did I know...)

Blogging was my first success story.

Keep in mind that up to this point I'm constantly at odds with myself. Resisting the drastic rate of change I was going through, fighting to understand the attention I was receiving and ultimately accepting that everything I've ever needed to attain everything I want in life was planted within me at birth.

After a year of blogging Tom would introduce me to my second mentor, Matt Jamieson, who taught me his method of marketing his networking opportunity online.

The three of us were joining a company together and in that 2 hour conversation with Matt, my eyes were opened.

In less than two weeks, my domains were hitting the first page in Google, then Yahoo and MSN on dozens of relevent keywords. In a matter of a few months I went from making no money to having more leads than I could possibly handle alone.

Soon after I would be making enough to qualify me as a traditional home based travel agent--simply from earning commissions on the sales of the product. This doesn't even take into account the money I earned from building an organization of people beneath me who also wanted to own their own business.

Now, lets go back to the beginning for just a minute. Knowing this about my history and the successes I've had... What would have been different about my life if I had decided to give up and walk away from network marketing after a few months?

Would I be as happy as I am now?

Would I have eventually faced the demons who plagued me for the first 30 years of my life?

Would my tendency to talk myself out of a good thing ever be broken?

Would I ever learn to make use of what God gave me instead of focusing on the things I lacked?

Maybe, but I'll tell you what...

Looking back at where I was and how much pain I was in ... that was a real lack. What I really lacked was a complete life. Because I didn't focus on the skills I lacked, I was able to reclaim my soul. The friends, growth and fun I've experienced was worth every bit of struggle, every tear.

This is why it is so important for you to not focus on the things you don't have. It doesn't matter if you don't have the personality, skills, or money. Focus on and be glad for the things you have and a path will be revealed.

Going Three for Three Courtesy of James Ray

Awhile back I talked about attending James Ray's Harmonic Wealth Weekend and because a turn of events, I was unable to go. I was disappointed but it actually turned out to be a good thing.

I share this because one of James' key concepts 'The Three for Three' had an enormous affect on my life. There is no need for me to explain the concept, you only need to watch the video to understand.

What I want you to do is really and truly consider his words. There was a time I didn't thing, feel or believe I would ever accomplish anything--and now, two years after I chose to believe otherwise my life is exploding with change.

Think about it.

Think differently.
Note how you feel when you do.
Then take action.

You know what? You're worth it.

So, get out there and live your best life.

Are You Consorting with the Lottery Mentality and Lady Luck?

Has anyone else noticed the growing trend of people adopting the "Lottery Mentality"? As an entrepreneur and network marketer I cannot help but notice a frightening shift in the way people think but its not just in business--it's everywhere.

The lottery mentality is the desire for unearned success or as Liz Strauss describes it "I Want Mine Gimme More". We have allowed it to become so ingrained in our way of thinking we are constantly in want for more, more, more! We are a people of instant gratification. I want mine. Gimme More.

You see the lottery mentality when...

• Someone says they are waiting for their breakthrough moment because they just know it will change their lives for the better and for all time. All I need is one great idea!
• You watch television. These "reality" shows and game shows are founded on the lottery principle. There is no talent or skill in being on the Price is Right OR better yet, in doing some of the phenomenally, disgusting and -stupid- tasks to be on a reality show like Fear Factor. I want mine, NOW!
• Watching network marketing company presentations. "I signed up 500 people in a matter of 2 months, I just received a 10K bonus and I have quit my J.O.B," He says with light in his eyes and a grin big enough to qualify him for the Joker look alike contest. "The best part is -anyone- can do it. Its easy!" [This one really hits close to home and makes me sick to my stomach considering my close proximity to network marketing companies and the industry]
• You look at diets. To be fair, there most certainly are some individuals who have lost sheer amounts of weight and kept it off but its mostly because they maintain the practices of good health and exercise. Not as a result of using the latest and greatest diet plan promising anyone can flush the pounds away in a matter of weeks.

The list could go on and on...

The Lottery Mentality and Lady Luck

Adopting this mindset places your hope in Lady Luck rather then good old fashioned planning and ingenuity. What happened to the days when we planned for our future?

Don't get me wrong. I'm all for life changing events, especially when they bring a positive to the person's life but I have yet to hear about a lottery winner who didn't lose all their winnings AND the shirt off their back because they didn't know how to handle the responsibility which comes with great wealth.

My point is, time is on our side. You might want untold riches, love or maybe you would be happy with a modest amount of fame but if you are not ready for these things to be present in your life, you will not know how to handle or maintain them. The danger in the lottery mentality is thinking that a small bit of luck is going to bring untold changes and happiness to your life.

Fame, Fortune and even Love can posses a jarring impact on one's life.

Are you ready for impact?

When we understand this we discover the time spent is a blessing. After all, if we got everything we wanted with little or no effort we would not respect or appreciate it. Think about it, doesn't it feel better to have earned the special something rather than having it suddenly thrust upon you?

To often the things we want are not in line with our passions, happiness and the lottery mentality mindset is a flashing red light indication.

Visualizing a Harmonic Wealth Weekend

MartySue Conklin and I had a great conversation this past Sunday. Time spent talking with her always leaves me feeling uplifted, in fact we were so well together because we continually work to motivate and lift each other up.

During the conversation she reminded me of our plans to attend James Ray's Harmonic Wealth Weekend in August. You may know the name  if you've seen the smash hit movie 'The Secret'.

I still remember the day Martysue spoke to me about the event. She was telling me about the product and the weekend, filling me in on all the details, knowing James Ray was one of the people I enjoyed most from 'The Secret'.

She goes through the whole spiel about the weekend, how there will be SO much information, group exercises and calls from James Ray going forward after the event to see how you are proceeding.

And then she says... so, do you want to go with me?

Um, um ... YES! (I barely got that much out ... seriously)

I should make a note that for some time before all of this happened I had been visualizing my ability to attend seminars such as this. In fact, the very morning of the call in which she sprung this on me I was going for a walk in the park, listening to my favorite tunes on my iPod and visualizing all the things I wanted to see in my life.

I was immediately excited beyond words and filled with an nervous anticipation--what could I expect from this weekend? I still am.. I can't wait because I know I'll learn more ways to create a better life for myself and those of the people around me.

Visualizing the things you want  is important, not because there is some magic involved that suddenly makes it happen. Visualizing those things creates a positive charge within you. Thinking about things that make you smile or excite you, does what?

Makes you happy.

Happiness creates light in your life and when you feel good, you are open to the possibilities which in turn will bring the things you desire into your life.

If you let it.

I wanted to spend time with James Ray.

I got it.

Not only that I know I will learn a lot over the course of that weekend.

You Have the Power

Serious hiccups or bumps in the road happen. They just do.

We cannot always control when things go crazy in our lives but we have two of the most powerful tools determining the outcome of those events.

You have your mind and the freedom to put it to use.

Throwing in the towel is the easiest path and the one most people walk but there other options--if you open yourself to them.

When I started working in Network Marketing I found myself in the same situation. I didn't know what I was doing, I was coaxed into starting a business and I was soon overwhelmed.

The pressure and fear of failure where getting pretty loud. Even with all of that on my mind I kept pushing forward, I kept trying new things.

I came to recognize the power of my own personal thought process after I began blogging. Writing about positive thinking, growth and the difficulties I was having created clarity. I began to see things differently because I was focusing and writing about positives instead of negatives.

Suddenly things started turning around.

I was introduced to Matt Jamieson, who taught me the SEO techniques to market my business online.

As a result, I have had first page rankings on many search terms, I'm contacted by more people than I can handle in a single day, and my view of my ability to make things happen has changed.

The truth is, all of this was already in me but if I had remained switched off I would have quit. Because I made the choice to engage my mind and feed it positive thoughts.. I myself as a whole have been changed.

You have the power to do so as well.

Don't think. Take Action.

You've got yourself a bright and shiny new goal. The blood is pumping through your vains and you're stoked! Every part of your being says that this time you're going to to stick to it and nothing is going to stop you.

Then its only a matter of time and you find that passionate feeling begin to ebb away and eventually it's gone completely.

To often we get caught up in the analysis paralysis syndrome of what ifs and planning.

Stop it.

Planning is great, and its essential but you don't need to form the long term plans before you begin. You can develop a plan AFTER you've begun. The first step in maintaining the motivation is to define what you can do immediately to start towards your goal--and then do it. Don't think about it. Don't plan for it.

Lets say you've decided to start eating healthier. You're first step could be to walk straight to the kitchen and get rid of all the tempting junk foods.

Starting to get the idea? Joe Vitale and The Secret talk about taking action as well. Its within you. If the nudge is there. Take action.

Action creates motivation and in turn motivation will create further action.

We choose to forget

This was sent to me this morning and I wanted to share it with you. Take the time to read it and let me know if it resonates with you as it did with me.

Response/Ability

we choose to forget
who we are and then
forget that we've
forgotten

who are we really? 
the center that watches and
runs the show that can choose
which way it will go

the I AM consciousness
that powerful loving perfect

reflection of the cosmos

but in our attempt to cope
with early situations we chose
or were hypnotized into
a passive position

to avoid punishment or
the loss of love we chose
to deny our response/ability

pretending that things just
happened or that we were
being controlled
taken over

we put ourselves down and
have become used to this 

masochistic posture

this weakness
this indecisiveness

but we are in reality free
a center of cosmic energy 

your will
is your power

don't pretend
you don't have it

or you won't

- Bernard Gunther

Facing the Giants

Today I would like to share a clip I came across while trying to catch up with some of my favorite bloggers. The subject is persistence and it's a very moving piece. Do you have this kind of stickiness?

What Giants do you face?

No matter who or what they are--always push forward.

Found Via Empowerment4life.

Change Your Behavior First

When I decided to start my own business a year ago, I knew that I was stepping into it blindly--I had no idea what direction it would take me. I also knew that my attitude and skill sets would have to change if I was going to survive and become successful.

Back then I was a energy sucker, I had a bad attitude, and that attitude stemmed more from my lack of faith in myself than the outside world's view of Tim Draayer. I look back and I'm embarrassed to say it but its true.

Over the course of the last year my attitude would change because I began seeking ways to change my thoughts BUT I realized recently that there is a bigger picture.

The decision to start my business meant my behavior would have to change as well as my thought patterns. It didn't matter if I believed that I was a business person or for that matter, if believed I could do it. In order to be successful my actions had to change.

If we don't change our habits, slipping back into the old thinking is inevitable. John Maxwell quotes Psychiatrist William Glasser as saying, "If you want to change attitudes, start with a change in behavior. In other words, begin to act the part, as well as you can, of the person you would rather be, the person you most want to become. Gradually the old, fearful person will fade away."

Much of what we do stems from habitual behavior. As time passes we develop our own ways of dealing with life (how we approach people, etc). If we want to see a change in the results we are getting from life, we need to change more than the way we think. Our behavior needs to change.

Some subscribe to the theory that you need to change your thinking first, while others, like the Dr. Glasser believe that changing your behavior comes first. They all have their points, but in my experience working on them both simultaneously meant less resistance between them.

Everybody experiences things in their own unique world view and so it is up to you to decide how to approach the changes you want to make. However, regardless of how you begin your journey the two are connected. You will not have one without the other.

I am a THOUGHT

I've been writing a great deal about perspective. A person's perspective can also be described as their attitude towards life and the world around them. Your attitude can be broken down into individual thought.

Your thoughts shape your life and there is no getting around it.

I recently read an excerpt written by Bob Conklin, a successful author, which demonstrates just how powerful a single thought can be.

I can make you rise or fall. I can work for you or against you. I can make you a success or a failure.
I control the way that you feel and the way that you act.
I can make you laugh ... work ... love. I can make your heart sing with joy ... excitement ... elation.
Or I can make you wretched ... dejected ... morbid.
I can make you sick ... listless.
I can be as a shackle ... heavy ... attached ... burdensome.
Or I can be as the prism's hue ... dancing ... bright ... fleeting ... lost forever unless captured by pen or purpose.
I can be nutured and grown to be great and beautiful ... seen by the eyes of others through actions in you.
I can never be removed ... only replaced.
I am a THOUGHT.
Why not know me better?

Your thought towards your neighbor is your attitude towards him. What you think towards everyone else stuck in rush hour, is your attitude towards them.

You my not be aware of it but your thoughts shape your perspective and when left to flow freely, you give the direction of your life away to the effect of those thoughts.

Are you aware of the pattern of your thoughts? When was the last time that you paid attention to the way that you think? Try listening to yourself and then ask if you like the direction your thoughts tend to go.

[Tim Draayer thinks that internal conversations come easy to some people because they are more aware of their own thoughts and feelings. Its part of their make up, but he also believes that it can be learned and is essential to understanding one's self.]